Have a Bitchin' Corporate-Mandated Purchasing Event, from the Wagner family! My, how the offspring embiggen. Pascale (the kind one) is six and a half, and Frances (the silly one) is almost four!

Pascale says: That's because your kids are active and playful, mama!

Frances says: I am the mother of snakes!

We wish you a Frantic First with your creepy Uncle Frank and alcoholic Aunt Gladys!

Love,

Jamie, Tyler, Pascale, Frances, and Spreckles (our tree)